The Art of Allowing

by Barbara on January 24, 2012

I am aware that I see beauty everywhere. Yet I do not see beauty reflected in the mirror.

New awareness….is this reflection—is that me?

This morning the words “Art of Allowing” jumped off the cd that was laying on my counter. Those words captured my attention…the Art of Allowing. This cd is one from a series called Living the Art of Allowing that has been in my car for a very long time, and is part of a 6-cd series that I bought back in 2006. As far as I know, it is the only cd left from that set that I still have on hand. I brought it inside after cleaning out the interior of my car. My intention was to listen to it again. The topic of cd # 4 is “The Amazing Power of Deliberate Intent”.

I am currently taking the Intent Home Study Course….again…this time taking with renewed purpose this time around, so I thought this to be no accident that I bumped into this particular message with the word “Intent” in the title and catching my attention. I have not re-listened to the cd, but since those words jumped off the page to me this morning, I decided that I would sit with the question of allowing during my quiet time this morning.

Back to the image in the mirror. When not looking in the mirror, I “see” myself as beautiful, loving, able to discern and appreciating beauty in all walks of life. So why does it feel so difficult for me to see that beauty in the image in the mirror? Am I believing in separation from those qualities? Am I believing that there is something I need to do in order to be a better expression/reflection of myself, lose weight, exercise, have face lift, change hair color any and all in order to be more beautiful? Is this what makes us beautiful? I know that isn’t true for others, why can’t I see that as true about myself? Is this the message I choose to be hearing for myself? No.

Those are exterior finishes….more like a coat of paint, right? Except that what I am seeing on the outside is reflecting what is inside. Right? Am I willing to uncover and expose what’s not true with this thought? Am I willing to trust enough, to love God and myself enough as God’s expression, that I am complete as He made me? Beautiful? “His work is done…behold, it is very good…”? Not human, right?

Do I have a belief in separation from my Creator? What is beauty? What is beautiful? Why is it so easy for me to see beauty everywhere except within? Yes, this is what needs to be let go—the belief that God’s idea is ever, could ever, be anything except beautiful and complete—not dependent upon a certain size, weight, color, height, form. Huge revelation and awareness.

I remember hearing my mother tell me on many occasions, “handsome is as handsome does”. I never liked to hear that phrase. What I heard was, “you’re not beautiful, be satisfied with the idea that you’ll never be beautiful, be a nice person instead so people will like you.” That is the message I heard.

I better realize now that this is why seeing beauty, helping others to see beauty they already possess, help uncover the error in thinking about what makes one beautiful has always been so important. I remember how that felt when those other words. This is the false belief that needs to be let go of, washed away, healed, leaving only love filling all spaces as to who we truly are.

When I look at pictures of my mother when she was a young girl, I see that she truly was a beautiful little girl. She also was considered large for her age, standing taller than her mother as well as her older brother. Her mother was a small and slender person. I can imagine some of the things my mother may have been told as a child from a mother who was not known for her nurturing qualities but had a rather austere, stern way that she conveyed.

I know that my mother associated small with beautiful and big with clumsy, big was not beautiful, and was never able to feel beautiful herself even though she truly was a beautiful woman. I thought that’s what she thought. It occurs to me now that perhaps it was because she had never learned how to nurture nor appreciate her innate beauty from her mother, that she was not able to see her own beauty. Her mother had never learned how to nurture, nor appreciate beauty beyond physical appearances, and was not simply able to teach my mother how to nurture either because she too had not been taught. (Thought comes…Does this mean that I don’t know how to nurture either? Another thought floating to the surface in order to flow away as an untruth about One Parent, Love, continues to be revealed.) Is this something that we need to be taught, or can we learn as we listen within to what our Source is telling us is true about us?

Big always was associated with clumsy. This is what I associate with the memories as I recall hearing my mother talking about me to someone when she didn’t know I was listening. She was telling them that I was not very graceful. I took tap dance lessons believing that I wasn’t graceful enough for ballet. Did I want to take ballet? I don’t remember, and I did enjoy tapping.

I had not taken tap lessons very long around the time that I was to go ice skating with my siblings. I was told that I had to use the double runner skates. I hated them. They weren’t pretty. They weren’t graceful. They were baby skates. I’m not a baby. (One of my favorite things about getting a baby brother was that I no longer would be introduced as the baby of the family)

I talked my sister into letting me wear her single-runner skates after she was finished, and while we were waiting for our ride home. I’ll show them, I thought. I can too skate on big-girl skates. But oh, those skates were much too big. It was really hard to skate on just one runner. I couldn’t do it. I fell. Hard. Then I couldn’t get up.

My brother and sister kept telling me to get up. Quit being a baby. Stop crying. But I couldn’t. Everyone kept trying to make me walk on the injured leg. I kept crying. I couldn’t. It hurt too much.

Finally—I don’t remember how long—they believed that I was injured. I was taken for an x-ray, and we discovered that my leg was broken—in two places. Everyone felt badly about making me walk on a broken leg.

I remember that cast. From my toes all the up to the top of my thigh, and I had to wear it a long, long time. I remember not being able to scratch the itch underneath that cast. I remember the smell from my toes because I couldn’t wash them thoroughly because of that cast.

I remember when that cast finally was cut off…..with an electric power saw…I was so very afraid. I was so disappointed when said that another cast must go back on because the bone wasn’t completely healed. The next cast was smaller but it still was uncomfortable and covered my whole leg. I don’t remember how much time went by for all of this, but to a 7 year old, it seemed like an eternity.

I remember when the second cast was finally taken off…..yes with a power saw again, still frightening but not as scary this time because I now knew they were not going to saw off my leg. I remember standing in our living room in that house in Ravenna, after coming home, finally without the cast, and with my whole family standing there telling me to walk. Only I couldn’t. My leg still hurt…..but this time because the leg was filled with pins and needles from being in a cast for such a long time. Much too painful for this 7 year old, in spite of all the prodding for me to walk. Everyone kept saying “don’t be a baby”, “stop crying”, “walk”. Maybe there were some nurturing comments too, but I don’t remember them. Selective memory from a 7 year old perspective.

I don’t have a memory of what happened next but I obviously did finally start walking again. I do remember that I never took any more dance lessons. There could be many reasons why, but what I believed was that it was because I was too clumsy. That’s what I heard when my mother told me, “Handsome is as handsome does”.

I have loved watching the Ice Capades. When watching, I felt myself gliding across that ice, dancing on single-runner skates, moving gracefully to beautiful music, wearing beautiful, flowing dresses, in the arms of a handsome man. Yes, that was me. I felt it all within. I did learn to ice skate, on single runners even, though I never felt quite as graceful as the professional skaters. I still love watching them.

I love to watch dancing too. I imagine myself waltzing around and around a large ballroom to the beautiful music and in the arms of a beautiful man. I feel it completely.

This is what has been uncovered. I better understand my love of graceful ice skaters and dancers and beautiful things.
I’m sorry dear Father that I have not been seeing your beautiful child as clearly as you do. I do feel your loving embrace. Thank you.

Many life lessons throughout this all of this uncovering and unfolding for me. I realize that in many ways I am still that little girl wobbling around the ice pond of life saying, “See, I can too skate on single runner skates!”

Thank you for this wonderful release of old memories. I feel nurtured through my mother’s expressing God’s love. I am grateful.

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Rainy Days & Mondays

by Barbara on November 28, 2011

I am grateful for rainy days and Mondays. Unlike the Carpenter’s singing how “it always gets me down”, I feel especially cozy listening to the gentle raindrops as they fall on the skylights creating a peaceful rhythmic background music for my quiet morning study time.

I am grateful for this time to reflect with gratitude as I remember sitting in Sunday School many, many years ago, if counting trips around the sun, but only a moment ago in my thought. This little girl of 6 or 7 sat during the silent prayer time that is part of Christian Science services before repeating aloud the Lord’s Prayer. I vividly remember how earnest she was as she asked God for His help to be good, to help her see and do what was asked of her today and every day, and I remember how honest and earnest this little girl felt as she spoke this desire silently to God.

I’m grateful for this reminder.

I’m grateful for another event experienced by this same little girl that came into my thoughts this morning. There was a family living nearby where this little girl lived around that same time as she attended that Sunday School. They had a granddaughter that would come to visit. She was older than I was but the grandparents loved that I would come over to visit her whenever she came to see them. She was blind. I didn’t really have a conception of what blind was even when they explained to me that she had an accident when very young that left her without sight.

I would play games with her on their front sidewalk, asking her to guess whether she was standing on the grass or the sidewalk. When she would guess correctly, I would get so excited and happy, then say to her, “see, I think you are starting to see a little!!” She would laugh, jump up and down and be so happy with that idea, wanting to play the game over and over. And yes, I fully expected this to be true, that she was able to see a little more each day.

The only other recollections I have about this blind friend were of her parents thanking me for helping her laugh. I don’t know where she is, how she is, having had no other contact with her from then to now. Yet, this morning I felt connected to her. I feel connected to that other little girl who helped her to find laughter in little things too.

There is a sense of joy remembering these two little girls in their innocence and gentleness, as they rejoiced in the moment, free from any sense of burden or hurt or guilt. I am so very grateful for this awareness and remembrance.

Thank you.

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A Visit From a Purple Martin

June 13, 2011

It’s a simple early morning routine; wake up, get up, hit the button on the coffeemaker, feed the dog. Put on a sweatshirt, slip on some shoes, look out the window and then open the door to let the dog out and some air in. Stand in the doorway and Thank God I’m Alive! This [...]

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We’ve all heard the age old question, “Which came first, the chicken or the egg?” And we’ve all heard the arguments for both sides. To some degree, this question exemplifies my lifelong question about Spirituality. Did God create man, or did man create God? I found an answer for myself this morning. To both questions. [...]

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Living in Tomorrowland

February 13, 2011

I have a confession, though I have not sinned. The confession is that I have not yet listened to the February Reality Shift though I did read Jet’s blog. She made a few points in her excerpt. The first, and the one I’m referring to is: We live today as if it was yesterday.”  Her [...]

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We Live Today As If It Was Yesterday

February 10, 2011

Yesterday I listened, again, to the Reality Shift talk for February. I heard, again, a concept that has stuck with me and I really needed to hear at this moment – “We live today as if it was yesterday.” Sorry, can’t remember who to give credit to. And I thought, “That’s true! I wake up [...]

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3rd Commandment study revelations

February 9, 2011

Third Commandment: Thou Shalt Not Take The Name of The Lord Thy God In Vain Here is part of my discovery in learning more about this commandment: I have thought that this commandment means that I’m not to use the name of God carelessly or falsely or disrespectfully, and this is true; but now I [...]

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having ears hear ye not?

January 6, 2011

I will share what’s unfolding to my thought and at the same time keep it brief……no easy task. As I reread the monthly commitments I shared through the Shift Masters last year, I was struck with the realization that almost every month I mention listening, deep listening as part of my intent for that month. [...]

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The Shift Center

December 10, 2010

A couple of years ago, I had a dream. I woke up in the morning with the details so strongly imprinted on my mind that it felt like I was looking at a photograph. So I did what I always do when I remember a vivid dream – I emailed Beca and Del and told [...]

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Small Events, Large Benefits

December 7, 2010

Everyday events can be wonderful gifts, made MORE wonderful because, even though small occurrences, they have HUGE impact on us. Maybe BECAUSE they are ordinary events in the course of the day…. Anyway, here I am on a sunny, cold Tuesday, and I’m annoyed. Not only am I annoyed, I am WANTING to be annoyed. [...]

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